Pitch Wars Edits / Writing Progress Report 3

I AM DONNNNNNE WITH LINE-EDITS!

***throws confetti***

Hi All--

It's been awhile, I know. Before I delve into writing, I should probably explain why I've been more silent than usual. This past month I've had to do some follow-up medical testing after my annual exam at the doctor's. Nothing to be alarmed about, but it's always scary to get a phone call from the doctor's office asking if you can do another test, and another test. When I was in high school my mother had cancer, so the doctor's office really gets my anxiety going. My teenage self really thought she was going to die and I'd end up an orphan (not my best high school memories). Thank heavens everything turned out okay. Next month, I'll be going in for another test, yay (heavy sarcasm). But I'm not going to worry about it anymore, since nothing is seriously wrong or life-threatening. Anyway, that's why I haven't been up to blogging.

As the title suggests, I've been working on line-edits and I finished yesterday night. I sent in my revised draft to my mentor, Brianna, and I feel weirdly calm about the whole thing. This week Brianna helped me a ton on my pitch and the first 250 words (the entry that's posted) so I'm breathing easier (as long as I don't think about the agent round).

Line-edits weren't as bad as I expected, especially towards the last half of my manuscript. The first half ended up needing more work.

A few things I learned about myself during line-edits:

•  I need a refresher on grammar rules. After seeing some stupid mistakes I made, I ended up rereading my copy of The Elements Of Style. Some common mistakes? Pronouns (Emperor vs emperor), the word capitol (when the whole time I meant capital), comma usage, dash versus semi-colon, noun matching posessives.
• SHOW don't TELL mantra. There's always a place where you can improve a part by showing it vividly as opposed to filtering or summarizing. Idiosyncratic details are your friend.
• Repeating words: and, but, that, just, etc.
• Don't over explain.

I could list a ton more, but this is embarrassing enough.

When I had a break from line-edits I devoured this year's Pulitzer in one sitting:

It was SO GOOD. The writing and story so beautiful and poignant. I felt like I was reading a narrative through poetry. I annotated my hard copy as I read, and really digested Doerr's writing style. When I finished the book around midnight, I was stunned. Why can't I write like this? Maybe one day. For now, I'll just keep working at it.

Besides line-edits, I've been researching my agent list, revising my query and synopsis, and critiquing my CP's manuscript (loving' it so far ;)). In other words, keeping busy!

Can't believe the agent round is coming. Eeeeeeppppppp!

I'll leave you with some photos of Blaire to make your Thursday a little bit cuter.

How has your writing been going? Comment below!

Pitch Wars Edits / Writing Progress Report 2

YAAAAAASSSSSSS! I turned in my first round of edits in yesterday night to my awesome mentor Brianna and I am both thrilled and nervous! It's also the last day of September! Which is grand, because I love October. I may just have to get a pumpkin latte to celebrate!

Anyway, so here's the skinny on my first round of edits. If you missed my first progress post last week, click here. Last time I talked about what I learned about myself in the process, this time I'm going to post about my method for it.

First and foremost I gathered all my notes from my edit letter and my video call from Brianna into my handy dandy writing notebook and made a list. The photo below is a simplified list I wrote up, with in depth details on the preceding pages (that I did not post). On the right side of the notebook is a progress log showing which chapters I worked on which day. I'm one of those people that works better in chronological order (gives me a sense of flow). As I write I also tend to jot notes down on a sticky and add them in.

 

My handwriting is pretty messy, but you'll notice that chapters 6, 7, and 12 were chapters that I had to work on for a while. What do they all have in common? They're scenes that has or leads to romantic tension. Yeah, the *feels* are tough for me. Luckily, Brianna sent me some really good articles to read. An article from Roni Loren was included which resulted in me divesting all of her blog posts for writers. I forgot which post it was, but Roni suggested the book below so I ordered it.

 

 

I found the book to be extremely helpful. It's not something to depend on entirely, but it helps when you get stumped and is pretty easy to navigate, so I recommend it.

 

So after I incorporated all edits I made another list for my read through:

 

 

A read through is a MUST. For me, I loaded my ms onto my Kindle so I could look at it in a different medium. This helps spotting issues you wouldn't otherwise notice.

 

During my read through I was able to read my changes with the rest of the novel in a short span to see if they worked or not. Two of my edits in chapter 4, and of course, 12, did not. So I ended up rewriting those again. But besides that, the ms read better. Things not included in my checklist were things like varying sentence structure, word choice, taking out passive voice, renaming chapter titles, and etc, which I changed as I read.

 

My draft is INFINITELY better than the draft I submitted to Pitch Wars. I love that I can see the improvements after having a mentor. My ms is almost there, but I think with a round of line-edits I can get it where it needs to be.

 

Edits are tough though. I was starting to hate the ms because I couldn't get some scenes to work, but after my reread, I fell in love with it all over again. I suffer from bouts of doubt from time to time, but I am also proud of myself and hopeful of where Diamond Queen will go.

 

To end, here is a song that I feel encompasses Diamond Queen. If I imagine the story like a movie, this would be playing at the end credits.

 

 

Lyrics:

 

Some days

It's hard to see

If I was a fool

Or you a thief...

Made it through the maze

You found my one in a million

And now you're just a page torn from the story I'm building

 

And all I gave you is gone

Tumble like it was done

Thought we built a dynasty that heaven couldn't shake

Thought we built a dynasty, like nothing ever made

Thought we built a dynasty forever couldn't break up

 

The scar I can't reverse

When the more it heals, the worse it hurts

Gave you every piece of me,

Don't wanna risk missing

Don't know how to be so close to someone so distant

 

And all I gave you is gone

Tumble like it was done

Thought we built a dynasty that heaven couldn't shake

Thought we built a dynasty, like nothing ever made

Thought we built a dynasty forever couldn't break up

 

It all fell down

It all fell down

It all fell

It all fell down

It all fell down

It all fell

It all fell down

It all fell down ehhh

It all fell down

It all fell down

It all fell down

 

And all I gave you is gone

Tumble like it was done

Thought we built a dynasty that heaven couldn't shake

Thought we built a dynasty, like nothing ever made

Thought we built a dynasty forever couldn't break up

 

It all fell

It all fell down

It all fell down ehhh

It all fell down

It all fell down

It all fell down

(And all I gave you is gone)

It all fell

It all fell down

It all fell down

Thought we built a dynasty forever couldn't break up



 

WWPR - M4 Read Through (Week 1), My Revision Process and Tips

After completing Draft One of M2 about three weeks ago, I was so fatigued. Mentally, I felt like I couldn't even write another page if I wanted to. Originally I thought I would send draft one as is to a CP after a read through so that she could just tell me everything that was wrong with it. But I realized just how lazy that was and if someone was going to read my story, I'd at least put my best foot forward.

So I took a mental break for two weeks (though at the time, I thought of giving myself a month to make sure I had some distance), but in the two weeks I binge read everything I could. And I found that the more you read and fill up your head, the more your own story recedes in the back of your mind, when you read for full on pleasure (and reviewing).

So after those two weeks of reading I came up with a timeline for the next month of revising for draft two:

Week 1: In-depth read through of manuscript from beginning to end.
Week 2: Revise beginning, based on notes.
Week 3: Revise middle, based on notes
Week 4: Revise ending, based on notes.
Week 5: Send to CP's and begin drafting query and synopsis.
***After receiving notes from CP's, do a third revision and send to betas. Revise query and synopsis accordingly.

At the end of week four, the revised draft, we'll call it 'M4v2,' will probably still contain sentence level issues (line-edits), but I hope by the end of it, the story will be nailed down and developed. If not, then CP's will be of much help!

My 'Read Through' Process:

I do exactly that. Read through the entire first draft. From the moment I typed 'The End,' I didn't allow myself to go back and make any changes, or even look at it.

So first and foremost. Print the damn thing.

Do not load on your kindle or read from the screen. Get back to the paper and pen and correct using the old school tools so you can make notes on the margins, add stuff between the lines, correct grammar, and note big picture stuff in your notebook. Printing it also gives you a visual of what you have accomplished.

As you go through it, organize your thoughts by highlighting and tabbing important details. I give myself a week just to read through because as you go, you are analyzing and thinking about how these words on the page stack up to what you want the story to accomplish. That's a lot of stuff to fill your head space so do it in a place you can concentrate. For me that was my home office in absolute silence. To assist you in your revision plan, take a look at mine in the next section.

My Read Through Tips for Revision:

Create a game plan. List what you are looking for. For me, it was three levels of stuff I was looking for: Big picture (the picture frame also known as the plot line), the structure (the subjects), and the details (the colors). To understand the three levels to look for, I correlate it by looking at a picture:

• When you see a picture you, immediately see the picture frame, what's holding the picture together. That's your plot line, it needs to hold up otherwise the whole thing will fall apart. When analyzing books for review, I noticed that if the plot line is out of whack, and doesn't make sense, or isn't believable, then nothing else would. The frame or plotline is the skeleton that holds up the story.
• The next thing you look at are the subjects or objects of a painting. These are your characters, the settings, themes, mood, tone, etc.
• Then the thing that really makes the picture pop are the colors, or details. In writing, that's the writing style and prose.

Here's my own example:

When going through revisions you want to work from the outside in. Get the frame, then the subjects, and then the little details. So after my read through, my priority was the big picture and structure. The details will be an ongoing process throughout the whole revision/rewrite process.

Now that you have the game plan, implement it during your read through, marking and labeling it up, as you go. When you finish you will get a glimpse of the whole picture with notes to assist you during your round of revision.

For that I tabbed different threads by color, and major to-do's with post-its (big picture stuff). For structural stuff I used highlighters, color coding character descriptions, settings, important quotes, and significant details. Everything else I marked up in red pen (quick changes right in the page) or blue pen (questions for myself to think about for the next draft).

Below are some examples from my own manuscript. Remember that everyone's process is different. I find that I learn a lot about my own process when I read about other people's. So this is me just sharing ideas, too, and I'd love to hear yours in the comment box below!

Here's an example of when I use stickies: when things need to be moved or things that weren't fleshed out enough that I need to address in the next draft.

As you can see I highlight using a color code system and edit right on the page with notes and additional passages.

 

All the while, I tab my threads throughout using a color code system. By the end this is what I got. Just visually, I like how it's sprinkled through out and not concentrated in any one color or any one area (beginning, middle, or end). It's spread throughout which is a good balance.

 

Now I'll quickly skim through what I've done and build a to-do list along with my notes directly on the pages. This will act as my guide for the next round.

 



What I learned from my 'Read Through':

The way I've written M4, while also keeping myself accountable through my blog, has made a vast difference in the quality of my first draft. I always dub my first draft the 'vomit' draft, because it turns out so messy, so unclear, that I nix about 80% of it and keep 20%. By the time I hit the final draft. I have about 5% of my actual first draft still in there. This time, because I had a clear outline and I knew what the story was about and I knew my characters, I was more prepared to write, and therefore this first draft is by far my strongest first draft.

Of course I wasn't always so sure. The beginning actually needs a lot of work because I still hadn't figured out the kinks or knew the character's backstory's in detail, but as the story became clearer the more I wrote, so did the writing. Remember my dreaded middle I talked about in this post and this post? It actually turned out to be the best part of my story and doesn't need as much work as the beginning or ending. Who would have thought?

Another thing I learned was to shut off the negativity in my head. You know, that critical voice that always complains and says 'This sucks!' or 'Really, you think you can be a writer?' I kind of gave it the finger because I saw how much I've improved these past two years where I've dedicated myself to novel writing.

Now, the best part of the read-through? Connecting your 'themes.' Sometimes you sit down with a theme in mind, and sometimes you don't. But in the read through you see your themes fully realized. Their like hidden gems as you read, full of delight and just makes the story come together. It's like the subconscious knows how to weave it in and you just have to find it to see it. I didn't have a theme in mind, so when I saw it naturally through the pages, it kind of made my day.

Hopefully by looking into my process it gives you ideas into your own! Share your tips below in the comment box!

Happy writing/revising! Until next week for another WWPR (Weekly Writing Progress Report)!

Beta Feedback So Far

As you guys know, the past three months I've been working diligently with my YA workshop critique partner to nail down my plot points and character motivation. Before leaving to Walla Walla two weeks ago I sent my fourth draft of M2 to four betas and my sisters to read. So in total I ended up with six readers! It was more than I intended since I didn't think my sisters would read it (but I am grateful they did!). As of now I've gotten feedback from 3 out of 6 and am expecting the rest of the feedback by Monday.

This is great news! It gives me time to polish up my manuscript before #PitchWars. And if I don't make it to #PitchWars, then I'll be ready to face the query trenches this fall.

Back to the feedback. Yesterday night I went out to dinner with Cristine to catch up and discuss my manuscript. Afterwards we came back to my apartment for wine and to hear Michael's thoughts on it too.

Along with my sister's notes I received this past weekend, there seems to be an agreement on a chapter that caused confusion and a desire for a more fleshed out ending. Thank the heavens, because these two main issues are totally fixable and won't cause ripple effects throughout the rest of the story or the subplot. Aside from other great little suggestions for tweaks here and there, I think the story line and pacing is pretty solid. So THANK YOU Dao, Cristine, and Michael. You have provided me with such invaluable insight and support. I can't wait to hear back from the other betas either as I know their comments will be just as important.

Since this is the first time I've shared my whole manuscript (not in a classroom/workshop setting), I just want to take a moment and smile until my cheeks hurt because this is a small victory. I can hardly believe that just a year ago I gave up on M1 and unplugged from writing for awhile.  Now in just ten months I've started a completely new manuscript (M2), gone through four revisions, and am now going onto my fifth revision before submitting to contests or querying.

Beta Reading, Synopsis, and Rain

It's Thursday which equals my Friday! Hallelujah!

Michael and I will be going on a getaway trip tomorrow to Walla Walla in Eastern Washington! I seriously cannot wait, this has been one of the longest weeks ever so I am pumped to get out of the city and do some wine tasting.

This week I sent my manuscript to four beta readers. I dowloaded it on my kindle too, but I think I should probably stay away from it awhile to gain some perspective.

M2 seriously drove me bonkers over the weekend, I thought I was going insane. The below comic explains it perfectly.

Though none of my betas are done reading, I've gotten some good comments which makes me sigh with relief (so it wasn't a complete shit show, excuse my language), but I am anxious for the bad comments that will eventually come. It's necessary though, contructive criticism will only make M2 stronger, which is what I want.

In the meantime I've been working on my synopsis and query (you'd be surprised how long it takes to write one letter and a 1-page summary). I've also been doodling ideas for a contemporary romance in case M2 doesn't work out. Though M2 has series potential, I don't want to invest the time in it yet without knowing if  it'll be published or not (though rest-assured, I do have brief arc of the whole series in mind).

Oh and lastly, there was a thunderstorn and downpour yesterday and it's raining today! I guess you can't exscape rain in Seattle, even if it is Summer.

Winter to Summer Writing Progress

This was me writing and taking a shameless selfie during the Winter. I had just finished the first draft of M2 and was working on the second. I didn't let anyone read a single page.

This was me this weekend. It's summer. Draft three is done. It is finally being read and critiqued.

And now, I am one third done with my fourth draft revisions. Draft Four. Can you believe it? I've taken many breaks and felt like giving up in these past eight months, so I've written this post to remind myself of this great feat I am undertaking and to encourage myself to keep going.

I've heard some writers say that you have to learn to love the process of writing to be a writer, and I'm trying to do just that. It's not about the end game. It's about the words, the characters, and their story.

the added scene

I split my revisions into three parts (chunks), the standard beginning, middle, and end. During my read-through the transition from the beginning to the middle felt awkward. I knew I would have to add a scene there to depict a turning point. I tried tackling it yesterday, but couldn't get out what I wanted to convey without making my MC sound overly dramatic. Needless to say, I didn't get much done yesterday.

Fast forward to now, as I write this: I finished it. It took me a long while considering its short length, but I am over the moon with it! Revisions are rough, but when you're able to find a gem like a successful scene that really ties up the story, it makes it all worth it. Now going into the middle chunk of revisions. Hopefully I can dig up some more gems :)

Keep on writing everyone, keep at your dreams, because the process is so worth it.