Arsenal


I’ll give you some matchsticks
along with some love letters,
(and tell myself,
I should know better.)
a knife
and a single rose.
Bullets to go along with a gun,
so shiny
and silver
I shiver
at the touch.

I’ll kiss that palm of your hand
Where you held it
as you held my face

Love in my eyes,
and trust in my kiss
for all the things you have
all the things you keep.
Never to use
nor ever lose.

Unexplored Territory

I went out for a run this afternoon, hopping to log about 6 miles. I have this out and back route to this wooden bridge on the river near my house that I usually go on. It's a pretty straightforward, but for some reason I got lost today and I don't know why.

On my way though, there were all of these butterflies along the river and the trail was littered with caterpillars.



So much that after 2.5 miles in on my run, I just stopped and decided to walk, not wanting to crush them by accident. Somehow, I took the wrong turn without realizing it. I thought I had stumbled upon a dry area, the word 'wasteland' coming to mind.


But I kept walking despite the rocks and weeds and came upon a peaceful place along the river that I had yet to see before.


And I wondered at that moment if this was somehow a metaphor for something I have yet to discover. 

I didn't go after the bridge today, instead I went all the way back home, the way I came. For the first time, a run didn't clear my mind. And for the first time, I got lost on a route I thought I knew so well. 

Present Moment

Yesterday I had the pleasure of catching up with a truly great friend. She's been with me despite all of the ups and downs of our college career and now that college is over for me and will be soon for her, we've realized how vast the world truly is.

It's kind of daunting thinking about where you'll be and what you'll be doing, but at the same time its exciting. Possibilities are endless, letting the mind wander infinitely. Sometimes I forget this. So used to being subject to fear, I wake up filled with anxiety and I wonder, "What will become of me?"

But there's some kind of wonderful and desperate beauty within that urgent question. For one thing, I acknowledge that I'm alive. How many times do we forget that we are when we go through the motions of life? How many times do we take it for granted? Being alive every day and having each day that comes my way simply gives me another chance to answer it. And I have the choice of keeping the same answer or changing it. It's all up to me. Though it comes with a responsibility, it is all empowering.

So take each day composed of moments and decisions and be present in every aspect of it. For who knows what the future brings and the past has already happened. But the present is ephemeral. Take it while you can before its gone. Some days will seem like the same, but believe me, they're not. Just like how every sunset and sunrise is different, so are you. Ever evolving, learning, and growing.

And there's never going back to who you used to be.


To my friend who inspired this post with her speech, thank you as always. "You're a damn good catch." ;]

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